half a day..

this is more like a dropping by entry... hmm.. half the day's gone.. but all seemed to move nicely so far..

woken up by the 'dong dong chiang' funeral at our void deck this morning.. hmm was irritated for a couple of seconds before i was back to sleep.. hahaha.. even tho my rest was kinda disturbed by the commotion.. still fell asleep like i heard nothing.. hee.. sleepy heady i am..

got myself outta bed.. greeted by 2 nice msges for a start.. sweet.. got all my books before i left for work.. whoa.. suddenly reminded of school days, was pretty sure my bag weighed more than it did when i was in poly.. well, gotta continue working on my assignment thru my break.. wat to do? sigh..

stepping into office......................... SURPRISE!!!

got a nicely packed breakfast on my desk and a pretty gift welcoming me.. oh.. how much more could i ask for on a mundane work day?? admirer?? nah.. from very sweet people in my office who keeps me going at work ;) thankz!!!

had a meeting.. plus a coffee break filler.. with a bunch of wonderful colleagues.. that's all for this peaceful morning.. and ready for lunch now.. (sound piggy don't i?? hahaha..) till the next! =)

physically tired ah..

not put in any entry since wed.. hahaha.. as expected.. starting to go out of action liao..

had been a really loooooonnnggg weekend..

volunteered myself as a 'tour guide' for the budget terminal tour on thurs and fri.. heard of it? well.. seriously.. no joke boy.. talking the whole day.. by end of each day i finished an average of 12 bottles of mineral water ah.. eh.. wrong.. it's neWater.. heehee.. but wah.. siong.. initially was to be conducted in english.. but after trying initially.. found the aunties and uncles giving me the 'huh' look.. hahahaha... bo bianz.. gotta use mandarin.. was a challenge sia.. my mandarin vocab seemed to have taken cover.. cannot find what words to use.. the lagi siong thing.. is on both days i had lessons.. wah... literally dozing off... imagine 2 days in a row.. was so afraid that i'd lose my voice.. tho i enjoy talking.. but talk the entire day leh!! sayang my throat..

then ah, actually think my boss super unhappy.. hee.. cos i threw aside 'my own work' hee =p but the tour is our director's initiative mah.. muz support right.. heehee.. well.. seriously tho tired.. i did have fun and really enjoyed myself ;)

attended the isow seminar on sat.. was full day ah.. another siong day.. but this time was a whole different thing.. i mean workshops and seminars for school and work.. pretty normal.. 1st time attending a workshop for serving Christ! basically it's on worship teams.. tho not directly relavant in the dance ministry.. but was a good one.. the worship was good and the whole workshop had lotsa interaction.. and there was this young gal with a beautiful voice!! when she sang.. i really kenna stunned boy! well, nonsense aside.. it's one of those 'you can feel God's presence' atmosphere.. so yah.. was good.. i thought i'd be again on the verge of dozing off.. but hahaha.. was pretty wide awake thru out! thank God for keeping my attention for Him =)

and today.. hmm service.. dance.. and captain's ball again!!! hee.. was fun ah.. hmm today's dance abit like screwed up leh.. but neva mind.. working for the better next service ;)

hmm the sermon content was pretty real in our lives.. 'tongues can kill' is really a very impt lesson and note to remember.. applies even more for people like me who likes to talk so much ah.. as the chinese saying goes.. 'talk more.. wrong more' sigh, will work on it bah..

captain's ball.. hahahahaha.. aiyoh.. this week ah.. like keep missing the ball.. thankz to those who advised me.. 'muz aim then jump'.. hahahaha.. i blur blur jump.. machiam style.. then keep missing.. cannot make it sia.. hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

k lah.. nuff liao.. muz prep on my assignment.. due on wed but i haven't even completed my reading yet.. and next whole week's lined up, whoaahh.. neva mind.. i will jia you!!

nice relaxing day.. but..

went for a swim today.. at good old tp.. =) finished a pathetic 8 laps.. pathetic compared against average standards but it's an ACHIEVEMENT for me!! hahahha.. headed home intending to work on my assignment.. hmm looking at my bed... ooh.. just so tempting.. snoozed off for the next couple of hours.. ;p well, had a nice dinner..

found out a sad news.. a friend, or rather, meu camarada ('my comrade' in portugues) passed away in January.. he's a nice guy.. i belief the last i saw him was in may 2005.. remember hearing his stories about working in sg.. and having to travel to china for work.. he's brazillian you see.. i remember his passion for surfing and the good joga we had in capoeira..

it wasn't long after we met in may 2005, that i heard news he was hospitalized for poisoning from excessive alcohol.. he was in china then.. he was in coma and sent back to brasil.. the only comfort is prob that i did meet him before the whole incident..

i neva knew if he was a believer.. but hope that he recieved and accepted Christ, and that he is with our good Lord now..

just a 'lil word of reminder and caution.. daniel (aka sarara) swore by alcohol.. no doubt his capacity for liquor is pretty hmmm huge.. but sometimes it's not about knowing how much you can take.. (you might not know when you think you do..) looking at what i know about his life, perhaps.. there woudn't have been any day he lived without alcohol.. this constant drinking could have become an addiction that he might not even have realised.. so much so, he prob wasn't so aware that the alcohol was eating into his physical health...

to all of ya, young and old.. take good care of yourselves.. i remember there was this part of the bible telling us to hmm look after our bodies and keep it holy.. cos it's the temple of Christ.. something along that line.. i can't recall the verse tho.. anyone?? anyways.. basically we do have the responsibility to take care of this body we have within our means..

nuff for today.. and yupz.. time for my assignments..

driving judgement questioned.. hee.. *-*

this a 'lil continuation from the last entry.. well well, fortunate me, i had my mum coming by to pick me up, and i took over the wheels heading home.. but juz as i was trying to maneuver the machine out of the driveway.. there was a "kkkccrrhhh" sound.. man.. i scratched the rim of the front right wheel.. the rim is immaterial to me.. but.. aiyah.. you know.. juz makes u feel sianz.. but ok lah, learn from experience bah.. hee.. but my poor bro surely got upset.. cos he got them changed i think pretty recently and he's one typical guy who lurves his vehicle.. so basically the moment i saw him i confessed.. ;p hahaha.. then he went like "scratch already, wat can i say?" wah.. ouch man..

k lah.. gotta work.. till the next =)

on a monday..

confession... i, melissa huang.. went to buy to-to today... in principle and practice.. i'm really not for to-to.. but no choice.. my dad asked me to buy for him before he left.. much as i was reluctant.. and tried to avoid it.. had to get it for him.. basically, my bro disvolunteered helping.. mum also not free.. wat to do?? as it is.. things were neva that nice with my dad for a long while.. so.. obliging his occasional requests came like a rare something i could do for him.. sounds like an excuse eh.. =(

well.. was a good evening tho.. went for this youth conference thingee.. ignite.. is that it?? i didn't even get the name right.. hee.. pardon me.. in-prompt-to lah.. hee.. but was a good fruitful time spent.. thank God for bringing me there ;)

know wat.. i really really like the song Amazing.. cos God's really so so so very amazing in infinite ways.. thru His wonders and His grace, His goodness and His praise, His sweetness and His all.. everytime i feel seek and feel His presence, the words just come to my head..

"You are amazing, forever saving, i'm captured by the power of Your love...
...i stand amazed, captured by Your grace, let me sing Your praise and stand in awe of You"

over the weekend..

let's see wat happened.. a friend lost his handphone! poor thing.. trade-in value about $200 ah.. ouch.. if you know about my 'losing handphone' history.. i prob deserve more sympathy than he does.. haha.... but k lah.. i really think ah.. those who delibrately stole mobile phones.. i've got nothing to say cos the intent was already wrong.. but those who actually found phones cos others have dropped them.. for your own life history sake, dun have to add a misdeed that you didn't intend to do wat.. i mean, do a good deed and try to return lah.. why make yourself commit an unintended sin.. the phone wasn't wat you needed or intended to steal wat.. sigh.. losing a phone also means losing convenience for a short period + losing contacts.. and of course $$$.. so well.. nuff said.. believe that my point is made..

saturday.. hmm did some laundry.. and yah.. went to the super crowded IT fair.. neva my kinda place to go.. but mel the dinosaur bought her 1st flash drive ah.. hahaha.. well.. really packed.. so didn't stay long.. but tell you all ah.. went to the marina square food court for dinner and spent $7 on stir-fried beef and rice.. thought it was like quite expensive lor.. i mean, it's not about affordability.. but i ordered the normal one at $5 but asked to add tendons.. and for that it was $7 ah.. thought aiyah.. neva mind.. just take lah.. end up ah.. i think the name should be called stir-fried onions with beef instead; i had a hotplate stacked with onions!!! and had to 'search' for the beef.. my.. hahaha.. but well.. was tasty..

the evening.. hmmm.. brokeback mountain was the movie i watched.. hmm kinda disgusted with lotsa parts in it.. before stepping in.. i thought i could be quite open minded about it.. but after watching.. erm.. can't comment lah.. simply distasteful.. heee.. to some extent.. the movie came across to me as trying to draw attention that the guys didn't quite have a choice for their ermm sexual preference.. like trying to draw some sympathy to this group of people lah.. and 'feel' for them.. but erm... it's like.. still.. simply so wrong lor.. sigh.. this world we live in.. aiyoh..

today ah!! wah.. have not played captain's ball for almost a decade!! and today i played ah!! wah.. the 20 min or so felt like an hour!! hahaha.. pathetic stamina i've got.. but was fun lah.. really enjoyed myself.. =)

and now.. home i am.. filling these bits in..

responding to my previous rather negative posts.. to all those who cares and were worried or prayed for me, many thanks.. dun worry, i'm fine.. =) just a sudden outpour of emotions.. i'm ok yah!! hugz!! =)

because he lives

ok.. enuff of the negative energy here!!

i said a little prayer last night, cried my hearts out, fell asleep and woke up with puffy eyes...

BUT.. it's ok, i'm fine and i'm gonna be brave.. come what may and i shall be ready for it.. let the fire for fighting continue to burn!! hee.. cheesy, no??

hahaha.. ok.. well.. as the hymn goes.. "because He lives, i can face tomorrow; because He lives, all fear is gone; because i know, He holds the future, and life is worth a living just because He lives"

and as the verse goes:

"...i have learnt the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. i can do everything through Him who gives me strength" Philillians 4:12-13

i wonder why..

i thought my blog would be a very sunshine mood place.. but dun seem like it ah..

i wonder why.. seems like i lost a certain control in my life..

i used to be very adaptable.. but i seem to be losing 'it' these days..
i always managed to be in control of situations in my life no matter what comes ahead.. but don't seem to be so..

is it growing up?? why are some situations just so painful.. i wish i dun have to face them..

transitions were always challenging.. but well, guess i survived them so far.. the first i remembered as some kinda challenge.. was when i was turning 13 going on to a co-ed school.. many more came along the way.. in fact, every year seemed more eventful filled with never ending learning curves (what a diplomatic term to use) till now..

but some things are just beyond our hands, aren't they?

transitions are always happening.. WHY DON"T THEY EVER STOP??

but i really thought i did manage to handle them..

perhaps i'm just tired..

you know.. when transitions happen.. it's like you have to look after everyone else.. think about how people are affected physically or emotionally.. and this applies to your own transitions as well as the transitions of people who are near and close at heart..

but it's really wearing me out!!!!!! and i dread it.. God give me strength!!! I need it..

just kinda bored and grumpy..

well.. i'm supposed to be working on my assignment.. which i'm still doing.. but.. need a breather.. took leave for this k.. and got pissed of by...

..."please note i've deleted this part of this entry cos it's pure complaining and complaining ain't healthy.. hahaha... so if you didn't read this entry earlier.. too bad!! hahaha =p... *this entry was originally posted on 9 March.

well, well, just feeling a lil grumpy here.. hmmm

anyways.. whoa with this blogging thing... i realised i'm so defeated by technology..

i'm helpless.. chanced upon the cbox thingee to get it on my blog.. and chanced upon how to add a name link.. and there.. stuck.. hahahahahaha..

neva mind i guess.. see how lah.. chance upon any thing then i'll add on.. wat to do.. i'm some dinosaur aged person when it come to technology stuff..

headache..

sianz.. i'm working on my assignment.. bluezzz... usual mel habit.. last minute.. pluz i've got a headache since early evening... aarrrgggghhhh...

emotions slaved by society?

just a thought.. cos i saw a colleague just now.. we used to have meals tog and kinda hangout.. not dating lah.. i mean colleagues, friends kinda thing.. can talk lah.. but due to some changes in my jobscope... seldom catchup cos less chances to meet lah.. sounds like a pretty normal situation..

today, we met over work duties by chance.. true that there isn't so much to say now.. understandable cos of distance and all.. but the friendliness kinda vanished too..

juz dun quite understand the adaptability of the human mind to non-existence.. simply, the mind seems so caught up, and the words come more distant.. i mean, no one's asking for anything.. and i'm not expecting some kind of hug or wat.. but thought it's quite natural that if you have met someone, spent time, and developed a certain level of communication there.. when you see the person again, you'd quite readily say hi... of cos i mean it in normal circumstances where nothing goes wrong, and no conflicts in place...

am i making sense in my point?? not too sure.. but i do believe people have feelings wat.. perhaps someone might be thinking i'm not indifferent from anyone else.. but.. it really seems like a phenomenon of the people sharing the world we live in.. we're growing further from each other..

if this is part of growing up.. (tho i'm not exactly a kid.. ) i must say that this is so sad.. and i do wish to pull out of this learning.. there' supposed to be warmth and love in life as i always believe..

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love" 1 Cor 13:13

yeah.. boss is not around.. update on my working life

basically i used to be in this happy bubble working in this organization.. with a great boss, where there's good chemistry, high productivity, positive conflicts and all good stuff.. basically i enjoyed this little space that i had despite occasional long hours or busy days.. all was sooooooo good..

and then.. there came this time... we were to have a re-org!!! man.. things obviously changed.. 'cos i had to be 'backside itchy'.. some fella 'poached' me from my unit, and i was so easily taken in.. well, ok lah.. not so exaggerating.. but i was lured into this unit to do some different stuff.. which to some extent i thought i saw as an opportunity.. but wasn't long before i realised, i got myself into not a simple challenging task.. the new scope wasn't my forte at all, neither my interest.. and pardon me, i'm not getting personal.. but boss's style really dun quite fit.. and to pick up these pieces.. i had to live with my decision lah.. muz be responsible for one's actions right???

k.. basically i lived with this choice for about 7 months now?! and hmm.. time to move on... really.. tho i grumble about it pretty often and skew towards some bitter feelings occasionally(bad huh).. i do keep myself mindful that it's not exactly anyone's fault that the change didn't work out.. well, no one pointed a gun in my head or wat...

the blessing is i would be moving on to a new jobwith a new company soon.. =) and moral of the story is.. before decisions.. really need to think carefully, and not impulsely decide based on surface perks.. and of cos.. after decisions.. really got to be responsible for them lah..

Thanks for the day

Thank God for this new day! that I'm still breathing.. hee.. obviously i'm at work.. but heck.. taking a breather in here =) but on a serious note, thank God for all His guidance and blessings along the way.. pray that my blog could be a source of blessing and comfort to many through my words and life.. till my next entry later.. ciao!

birth of mel's blog

hellooo... prob no one's gonna read this till some time later.. cos still setting the blog up..

once it's more settled, will update more stuff.. till then..

God bless!

love mel